Fear, scientifically its an emotion like another emotion specialized with anxiety. might also be preceived as a anxiety disorder. its been told that the knights of the round table have no fear and they go through magical forests and enormous castles where they fight dragons, fire-breathing dragons and not so much with scent of fear…I disagree, those knights were terrified because scientifically there exists about five innate fears which are death, embarrassment(social norms), rejection(acceptance in society), loss of love and my favorite falling(or fear of heights). but the question is not wether the writer of King Arthur was a liar or not, after all he was a convicted felon and was sentenced to jail and it waas during that time where he wrote his ever greatest master piece: king arthur and the knights of the round table. a thirty volume book. but the question assuming that the writer is a truthful man, how did such men stand in front of a dragon and unholster their swords and their shields and swing that shiny iron sharp weapon till they defeat the dragon. the question is: is possible to master your fear, after all fear is only an emotion, a strong one indeed but so is love, exuberance and hate, they're all emotion which we seem to have mastered pretty well. two years ago I was sitting on bed almost as comfortable as this one is and I made a vow or promise, it wasn't written or signed by any lawyer, it was a war between myself and I, I was going to destroy fear within me, I was going to stand eye to eye with death. the only problem was I lacked a tactic and a strong will for that matter. it was when I heard about the parachutting ,I figured it out. the tactic was simple that I chose to do the things I feared the most, I was going to jump from the plane by my own will I wil do it. I joined the team and was invited to a family, crazy people like me with a desire to do an amazing thing, to jump by will from a plane. and after a month with hard-ass trainning, I woke up got dressed, went to the airport, got dressed and got on that plane. the sound of the engine, the whispering of the jumpers, the sweat on my body, my trembling feet, the sound of captain, the yells he yelled and the taunts we shouted, the smiles you see, and you get up one after another and the door opens and signal is signed to jump and all you can think about is death, how the chute wont open and you'll land smack face on the ground and everything u did bad or good was over. and that kept growing and growing controlling every piece of me, I was shaking, it was terrifying, I was only a few steps away from the door to jump and oh when I saw it, it was majestic the view from ontop, that high, the clouds, the yellow desert, it was more like orange, and you falling with extreme speed and your heart is beating with passion as if its happy and gay with joy, it magic, its magic, its magic… in those two seconds of free fall, we only seem to appreciate life and its beauty when we are afraid. when we are falling…I understand now, how the knights of the round table stand eye-to-eye with those fire-breathing dragons, theyre afraid and at the same time happy, they went in to that castle and they knew what they'll find, it was by their will that they entered and fought. they were courageous, they were afraid. I had to break my promise, I don't want to destroy fear but I want to decorate it, with parachutes and boxing gloves and any fearful thing I decide to do.
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January 24, 2011 // Neo Imago // No Comments
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Original Page: http://thinkwritemake.blog.com/2011/01/24/the-strength-of-a-terrified-man/